We watched anime all afternoon, and whatever movies we could think of. I really enjoy things like that, especially when I'm with Gray, but I can't forget the woman I saw on her laptop.
I'm sure that woman is his ex-girlfriend. But, why is that? If he's EX, why doesn't he still delete the picture of the two of them? Maybe he hasn't forgotten about her yet.
What am I here for? Covering holes? Ouch!
I don't know but ugh! I want to tell it to Gray, but I don’t want to ruin our moment. Maybe, he doesn’t have time to delete it. Honestly, I don’t know anything about them. He never told me about his ex-girlfriend. I felt jealous. I felt like she’s better than me. She was even more beautiful than me.
I just tried not to think about anything so that my whole day with Gray would be happy. When Gray and I got tired of watching, we just ate something. He has a lot of chocolates in his fridge so I somehow lost what I was thinking. Chocolates are really effective when I’m feeling down.
He also told me stories and I tried to make sure he didn't notice that I was thinking of something else. Even though his joke isn't funny, I'm laughing. Damn! I hate this feeling.
The sun was already set when he started cooking. I wanted to cook for him but I wasn’t really in the mood to do anything so I let him do whatever he wanted to do. I felt so down and really tried my best to just be happy. I don’t want to ask him because I might not like what he’s going to say.
I told him I would just lay in his bed, but the truth is, I started investigating. I looked around the shelves until I saw a frame lying. I thought about it for a moment until I decided to pick it up. Damn! I shouldn’t have picked it up because it was a picture of him and a girl, the same girl in his laptop wallpaper.
I sighed and went directly to the terrace. It was a cloudless sky. Where are the stars when I need them? Well, I am not really fond of them since I like sunrise more than anything. Although, somehow I wished they’re some stars to look up to because the sky is so sad like what I am feeling.
“What happened? Did I do something to offend you?”
“No, I am just tired,” I lied.
“Did you see it?” He held his breath waiting for me to answer.
I glanced at him and smiled a bit. “Do you still love her?”
I saw the look in his eyes and there was hesitation which made me even more sad. “It’s okay. Don’t answer it. Let’s just eat. Are you done cooking?”
I passed by him and went directly to the kitchen.
“I like you. I really really do.” He hugged me from behind as he whispered those words.
I nodded. Yeah. He liked me but it was like and it’s different from love.
“Let’s just eat, okay?” I said and we spent our dinner quietly until we washed the dishes. There were silence and awkward moments until I laid down on the couch and decided to just watch the television.
“Do you know how to play the guitar?” I asked upon seeing the guitar on the sides.
“No.”
“Are you serious?”
He nodded. “It’s my brother’s guitar.” There was bitterness in his voice when he said that and I again don’t want to ruin everything so I picked up the guitar and decided to sing.
“Wait, you know how to play?”
“Obviously, Mr. Gray,” I chuckled. “What song do you want me to play?”
“Cool…” He widened his eyes.
I smiled and started playing You by the Carpenters while he listened to me.
“How was it?”
He didn’t say anything and he just hugged me. “Thank you.”
How I wished I could hear him say, I love you.